Ludoh seems like a sweet little cat. He just keeps coming into the flat, and keeps chasing Poppy or just sitting around staring at her so that she won't make a move. So I can't encourage him, have to keep chasing him away.

And it's okay - I understood what you mean. Small can't help not understanding, but that doesn't mean inappropriate behaviour can be tolerated. It is just really difficult to find sanctions that work, or explanations that make her understand the implications of something enough to not do it again. Man, the circular arguments last night! Trying to just make her see that this wasn't something that could be forgotten about immediately, while she was just flipping out about it being over now and wanting to pretend it never happened.